…of the spiritual closet.
When I began Mumolution, I didn’t know what it was exactly or what it was going to be. The name came to me, and I knew it was about evolution – growth – expansion – for women and mums. I knew it was going to be about community and coaching and healing – because these are the things I do, but I didn’t realise at the point of inception, that we’d be talking of the spiritual realms!
I just felt my way into it – into me – one step at a time. And those steps have led me here. To confess to you that I have been in-hiding – not just from you, but from me too – I’ve been in-hiding from my spiritual side for a very long time…
I guess I discovered my spiritual side as a by-product of going to church when I was a kid. I was adopted into a vicarage family, and part of the deal was going to church every Sunday! I wasn’t an “easy win” though! I questioned and challenged everything!! And over time, I discovered my spiritual side… What do I mean by that? Well, I found that beyond the words of the services, or my own poorly-formed but genuine heart-felt prayers, was another “life”, or aspect of life, that if you tapped into it, miracles happened… Little everyday miracles – if I dared or remembered to ask – like a nosebleed stopping instantly, or the swelling in my ankle disappearing, or finding money! It felt like magic. I used to sit on my bed and “pray” without words. I guess it was more like meditation really – just being. And connecting. Connecting to the soul deep inside me, and to the source that is all around me and extends out into the “everything else”, to infinity – and beyond…
But the trouble was, by now I was a teenager, and although the connection was strong, it created a lot of confusion in me – it felt as though I was living two different lives. There was the voice guiding me from the inside, and my head and body leading in a different direction – towards normal teenage fun!
I remember one day having the weirdest of experiences, something I didn’t utter a word of to anyone for the best part of a decade. I was sat on my bed, meditating-praying, when I became aware of this light in my room. Not like the light from a lamp, but like the brightest whitest blinding light that completely filled my room – it was like sitting or floating in a box of pure brightness. I opened my eyes, and it was still there. It was real. It was so bright, I couldn’t see anything else in my room – it was just me and the light. And guess what? I was scared! Like REALLY scared!!! It took me a little while, but I managed to shut it down, and I just sat there, wondering what the…?
And that was the turning point. I turned my back on ALL of it. I slammed the door shut, locked it, and threw away the key. I even did a formal “renunciation”.
From that point on, I continued to live a pretty normal teenage existence. I had a boyfriend, I finished school, went to college, and got a job…
Life was mostly fun. I didn’t look back. Except for the occasional glance when I needed help, or felt really alone, or something dark happened… I’d shut the door on it and thrown away the key. There was no going back, …was there?!
I remember being about 15 years into my accidental career into Technical Writing – the money was great, and the freedom it bought me – but everyday when I began the charge across the bridge to the city, I felt every cell in my body saying “NO!”. I had an overwhelming feeling of feeling “out of touch” with myself! I decided couldn’t do this any longer.
And so I got a place on a glass course in the midlands, and quit my job! I just jumped!!! I had to do something with my hands. I had to get back in touch. With what? I didn’t quite know. But I couldn’t ignore this feeling anymore.
And so my journey home began. Alongside glass, I trained as a life coach. An NLP Practitioner. Then as a Hypnotherapist. The emphasis was all on the mind and how much more we could embrace life if only we learned how to use our natural abilities more consciously. And it was good. To begin with. But it wasn’t enough. Deep down, I knew there was more, but I was still in the process of remembering…
In the interim, I met my husband, got married and had my two kids. And all the challenges that came up – especially to do with “identity” and finances – served only to spur me on!
I discovered energy healing, which began to tap into something “bigger” – more ethereal, if you will. And then I felt drawn to train in Angelic Reiki. Why? I still didn’t know – LOL!!!
I also dabbled with MLM companies, and Law of Attraction and Abundance entered my life, and challenged me in new ways.
I read copious amounts of books, listened to audible books, watched and followed the most awesome and inspiring people on YouTube and Insta!!! I began dancing, and singing (on my own!!!), and tapping into my sacred feminine…
A year ago I became a meditation teacher. And during my training, I discovered how much further research had come with understanding meditation, and woo woo stuff (quantum physics). It took it to a new level for me! It made me feel less cuckoo, and more “normal” as I realised I wasn’t on my own with my journey. I was totally “cuckoo”!!! Teaching meditation, and developing my own practise again, brought me yet another step closer…
And finally, I stumbled across the Creation Codes and Soul Purpose Readings. Something I’d always steered well clear of! This was the final piece I needed. It held the story of my life to-date with the challenges I’d struggled with, the denial of spirituality, even the difficult early start I’d had in life (being adopted). It was all there. And as I came to understand my chart, I came to see and accept what my soul has been calling me to do.
And while I’m only just taking my first steps out of the spiritual closet, and don’t really know where this is going to take me, I DO know that this IS my path, and I’m committed to fully expressing “me” in a bigger way!
I’m soo excited (and a little bit nervous) of putting this out there. But I know this is the next step on my journey.
So what does this mean for Mumolution? I don’t know! But I DO know that it will unfold in the fullness of time… My guess is that Mumolution is for you – whatever step of the journey you are on. And I hope that by simply sharing my story with you, it will give you permission to explore for yourself. …And if you’re wondering where to start – do what I did, and just start from exactly where you are, begin to become curious – and see where your soul leads you!